‘Just put on the helmet.’

‘What? No. Leave me alone. I’m going to bed.’

‘You won’t even feel it, you’ll be asleep.’

‘I said no.’

‘C’mon, put on the helmet.’

‘Could you get that away from my head? What’s that even made of? Is that tinfoil?’

‘They can’t see our thoughts this way.’

‘Heh? Who’s they—’

‘Hush,’ he covered my mouth with his hand, ‘they’re in the walls.’

‘Mhmmhmhmm…’

‘If you squint your eyes, you can even see them…’

‘Mmmmhmhm…’

‘Their black spines, their little beady eyes peaking out from under the wallpaper…’

‘Mmmmhm…’

‘Almost makes you want to…’

‘Mmmm!’

‘Kiss them.’ He let go of my mouth as he fell on the floor and started crawling to the opposite wall.

‘What the fuck are you talking about?!’

‘So shiny…’

‘Rob, what the fuck has gotten into you?’

‘Huh? Rob…’

‘Why the fuck are you crawling? What are you talking about?’

‘Oh no…’

‘What has gotten into you all of a sudden?’

‘They’re in my head… they’re in my head!’

‘What the fuck? Who—’

‘Shit, there’s no time! Quick, go to the kitchen and get a knife. You need to stab me. You need to kill me!’

‘What!?’

‘Quick! Oh, fuck, I’ll get it myself.’ He stood up and ran to the kitchen, quickly returning holding a knife in his hand.

‘What’s the meaning of this…’

‘Quick, stab me, right in the heart. Quick, do it, do it!’ He put the knife in my hand.

‘What are you talking about? I’m not going to stab you, are you crazy?’

‘Ahhh, I can’t do it myself…’

‘Okay, listen, if you put on the helmet, will it help, with the lizards in the walls or whatever?’ I started passing him the helmet.

‘Help?’ he knocked the tinfoil helmet out of my hand. ‘No, that will just keep them in! It’ll make them stronger! Are you trying to make them stronger?!’

‘Look, I don’t know, I’m just trying to help…’

‘I know, but—wait, hold on…’

‘What is it?’

‘You said lizards? How did you know they’re lizards? You can see them too then?’

I smiled at my friend. I hugged him with the knife. I smiled at my corpse.

21.XII.22